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Posted on August 23, 2016.

The Results: Working with My Relationship to Money

This is a continuation (albeit with a big break inbetween) of the January posts on my relationship to Money. Start the series here: Healing my Relationship to Money - Part I.

Working on my relationship with Money has been going on for years, but in January I made a very significant shift, and in January through February I also brought in a good bit of money. That's how this works. I paid back rent. I caught up on my bills. Then of course I fell off the wagon -- you can tell because I didn't write in the blog for 7 months, never wrote about my results, and so on.

But hindsight is 20/40. So it's good to look back at the last several months. What worked? What didn't?

My journaling also fell off the wagon -- and I tried getting back to it, and having problems getting back to it, several times between the end of February — 2/18 to be exact — and June. The entry on 2/18 says "Started coughing." I ended up with a flu & a cold back-to-back for the next several weeks, and my journaling got very spotty indeed. I also had some dissociative issues (relating to my mental differences, so essentially a mini mental health crisis, possibly exacerbated by illness). It's not an excuse, it's an "in retrospect" because I didn't beat myself up for it then, and I won't now either.

From what I can piece together from my journal: I was doing a lot of work on a fiction series I'm working on, trying not to get more sick, working on client projects more than myself, soliciting for more jobs/gigs, on 3/3 I wrote "Hot flashes?" so I may have had a fever, and I started to get worried that I might get pneumonia again.

The week of 3/13 I noted that the cold had started 2/18. I worked on my taxes and generally held myself together with duct tape and promises, naps, hydration, etc. I also had to do BOTH of my kids' taxes for the first time, so I did 3 sets of taxes!

And throughout there are days in the journal that are blank or have 1 entry or 2 entries as weeks went by.

May is just blank altogether. June is fairly well tended to, then I picked up daily work in the journal around 6/1 again. 8/1 I started using the Version 0.3 of my journal -- so I closed dow the one I'd been working with for 7 months and started using the new book diligently.

Why is any of this relevant? Well, work has been OK in general, it was great in Jan & paid off in February — when I was paying attention to Goldie, my Money Honey — but then it kinda petered out as I was sick & caring for myself & my business and "forgot about it". I switched journals and have been diligent about using it the way it was meant to be used since 8/1 — due to an agreement with Goldie.

And I'm seeing results again. To review:

I started my full-time local business in January 2006. Since then my "dead months" are August and from about December 10th through February 15th or March 1st.

So, I was working with Goldie in late December through January, and my January-to-February income was UP. Better than ever.

I started paying attention to Goldie again in late July and talking to her or paying attention to her DAILY — and my August income is up.

Days when I'm able to be fully present with her I can end up with several new gigs to do. It's actually uncanny.

So, as an extension to the last posts that I had, here's some of what I've found success with:

  • Touching base, if not actually having a conversation, with Goldie every day.
  • Bills are love letters to me from Goldie. She's reminding me that she loves me and finds me interesting, and that she's hoping I'm thinking about her.
  • Writing checks and paying bills is answering her love letters. If I can't do it right away, I at least note it in my journal & my budget list so that I know what it is, how much, and when it's due. This shows that I care, just like putting an appointment for a date in your calendar.
  • "Use the journal as intended." —That's been her daily message this month. When I do, she knows I'm present and she sends me more customers.
  • Don't be clingy and jealous: my Money Honey is allowed to have relationships with other people. It's really bad news when you tell your lover that they can't see their friends, family, co-workers, etc. out of selfishness or jealousy. So my Money Honey is allowed to spend time with others.
  • My former 3 posts in the series helped A LOT. I am not feeling resentment or harassed when I get bills (and went a step further to bills are love letters as I said above).
  • I do still have some issues when I get calls from bill collections departments etc. So that's something else for Goldie and I to discuss, locate the problem, and work on it.

On top of all this, my creativity is skyrocketing as well. Which means I have to try to be even more present so that there are more hours in a day. More about that another time.

Other Posts in August 2016

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